Beware of Your Intuition
Short Bits - Communications
Oh hello there, welcome (or welcome back) to the blog! Today on the menu: how to simultaneously flip someone the bird and signal approval through one gesture in the same zoom call. I know, brilliant!
Honest note from the editor:
When I started writing this article, my ambition was to uncover the true nature of communications, the way in which it forms the foundation for our personal and professional relationships and success stories. Turns out that 1000 words or less can't do the topic justice and are altogether too restrictive for my writing style. Not enough space for prose and scintillating adjectives you see.
So let's start with the basics why don't we, and grow this exposé on communications together over time.
Are you a communicator? Yes you are.
Whether our job title says it or not, we are all communicators. We are born this way (baby). It's what connects us to our families, enables us to make new connections and expand our network. It is something intuitive, intimate. Our way to project our personality and convictions into the world, to drive change, and in my case a way to talk about sustainable development until my dinner guests' ears melt off.
But are you a good one? Well...
We must learn foreign spoken languages (and sign-languages if hearing-impaired, for there are many across the globe) if we are to communicate with other cultures, and many who do so are showered in the adulation of their peers. Have you ever witnessed the "How many languages do you speak?" -- "5" -- "Oh wow, you're so awesome!" - situation? Exactly.
Interestingly, what is often overlooked is the way in which our non-verbals are assumed to be universal in nature. We use them almost unconsciously, deeply intuitively. According to Albert Mehrabian's 7-38-55 Rule of Personal Communication, the power to convey meaning actually doesn't reside in the words we speak, but in how we speak them:
7% of meaning is conveyed through spoken word.
38% of meaning is conveyed through tone of voice.
55% of meaning is conveyed through body language.
So isn't it a curious thing that nearly all modern language learning focuses on the spoken word? To all the proud polyglots out there (I count myself among them), shouldn't we all be poly-head-tilters, poly-hand-flickers, poly-eye-contacters? Behold:
A thumbs-up in the US and most European cultures would indicate a job well done. In Greece, the Middle East and some Asian countries however, it can easily be interpreted as flipping the bird (hence the subtitle of this article).
The 'OK' hand-sign, used commonly in most predominantly caucasian nations, can actually be considered to be quite a vulgar expression in some Latin American countries. Richard Nixon famously got into trouble using it on a visit to Brazil. "Booooo!" the crowd said.
Eye contact (again, in what I call "Caucasia") is considered a sign of confidence, truthfulness, attentiveness. But depending on the intensity, can also be used to either intimidate or flirt. In much of the Middle East, same-sex eye contact can be more sustained, more intense and a cause of discomfort for e.g. Northern Europeans without this knowledge. When you then hop to Asia, some African Nations and much of Latin America, this level of eye contact can easily be seen as confrontational, challenging and aggressive.
The list goes on (read more here and here), and as pitifully generalised as these points are (again, 1000 words or less limit...), I do hope that they make one thing clear: beware of your intuition when it comes to body language, this most powerful conveyor of meaning. It warrants study just as much as spoken or signed languages do.
So, what does it all mean?
To me, communication is both an art, and a science. It is a skill that can be learnt, a craft that can be honed. Not to manipulate, but to convey messages with clarity. To invite dialogue, mitigate conflict, and to establish a sense of sameness among us. So that we may collaborate more effectively and form partnerships to address global challenges across cultural divides. As with any skill, the more you practice, the more you read and truly comprehend it, the more fluently you'll be able to exercise it. It stops feeling like science, and returns to art, to intuition.
Without study of the basics, we won't be able to master situations of greater complexity. Stock market indices have fallen because of a poorly chosen adjective during a financial review. Cross-cultural business relationships were broken by an inappropriate flick of the hand. And most recently, the President of the European Union saw the power of her office diminished by way of a seating arrangement. Arguably on purpose, but the point remains:
Gestures speak louder than words, so if you want your voice to carry your message, be sure that your body language supports it.
Let's go get it,
Tom Zamzow